What brought me to this thought is the following story:
Even before knowing I'm an empath, I knew I could help people and take their negative emotions. Each time I did it, I had a violent dream about me trying to save the person from something trying to hurt them. Each time I was in sort of a warrior position. I always thought it was because of my passion for female warriors throughout the history as a child. I also feared losing temper for no reason, even if I come from a family who does this all the time in a non-violent or traumatic way.
When puberty hit me and my magical/paranormal side opened, something really strange happened and I thought it was only me who thought so. A friend of mine told me today she thinks the same, even though she doesn't believe in such things.
In my first High-school year, the rich guy in my class and the most fake and egoistic person I ever met, hit me because I said no to his proposal. From that moment, I lost myself. My friend told me today,that my pupils dilated and I started to fight him. The thing is a sort of professional fighter and I'm a peaceful person who can't even kill a fly. Anyway, I fought this guy who is also twice my size, put him down and the first thing I remember was my foot against his throat. From that moment I feared losing temper even more. I'm still not sure where that fighting side of me came from and questioning what would have happened if I didn't "wake up". Would I have pushed and break his trachea? People said I am the reincarnation of an Amazonian, but only for fun as nobody I know believes in this.
The second strange thing happened a year later, when my grandpa died. I was the one everyone considered a rock,kept my calm and helped the others. But before putting him in the grave,I lost it again and I started crying. I don't remember what happened next, but was told that my pupils dilated (again) and I started talking to my cousin about honour, duty and respecting the sacrifice of the dead warrior. He freaked out a little bit and hugged meme. I "woke up" with no clue of what I said or why I said it.
Is it possible that when I get out of my zen state, a violent past-life me comes out? Or what can be done to understand more about this side of me?
I did some research but no useful info came up
