Connection? Or is it just me?

[justmeleo]

Yes, there are a lot of bridezillas out there. But there are also a lot of Justice of the Peace marriages in courtrooms around the country and of course there is Vegas. Not everyone has a fancy wedding day. I disagree that a bride's obsession over color is what makes a marriage fail. Lack of communication, unrealistic expectations of what marriage is, not really knowing who you are or who you partner is. To sum it up there is a lack of connection with self & partner that makes a marriage fail. The connection that an old married people have is more than finishing each other's sentences. It goes beyond disease and aging. Ever notice that when on of the partners dies the other seems to follow shortly after. This connection can be seen between animals too. I'm not just talking about "Where the Red Fern Grows" either. I've seen it with pets. If you are able to connect & communicate on a higher plane then to me you have a better chance of making it work. Sometimes our earthly pride keeps us from doing what we really need & want to do. That's when that higher plane communicate is necessary for the walls to be kicked down. I know that I want a love that transcends this earth best examples that you might have seen "What Dreams May Come", "The Notebook", "Bridge Across Forever". Yes, I know that Richard Bach's marriage failed but the connection between them is still there. That didn't fail. That connection on a higher plane is why we are wicca.[/b]

[Sobek]

"I disagree that a bride's obsession over color is what makes a marriage fail."

i didnt say that, i just used a sometimes applicable truth to enforce my point that too much emphasis is put on the wedding instead of the reasonings behind it.

[Sercee]

All to often the wedding ceremony is made up to be a big event for the guests, but it's actually for the couple and everyone seems to forget that. I'm lucky in that my inlaws and parents know that and want to help me, not plan it for me.

[Sobek]

if/when i get married, i would want it to be fun, none of that formal crap. i would go a themed wedding. it wouldnt even really be a wedding, just a themed party with something special as the foundation.

[justmeleo]

Trust me if/when I get married again it will be very simple, spiritual thing not a social thing. Probably just a chapel or outdoors, no bridesmaids just flowergirl/maid of honor (my daughter depending on her age at the time), no catered event, just a homemade wedding cake. I too think it is crazy for some people to spend the obscene amounts of money like Donald Trump (insert almost any celebrity) did, etc. What a waste of money when it could have gone to some deserving charity.

[Sercee]

What a waste of money when it could have gone to some deserving charity.

The same goes for many of their excesses. Granted, when you're that successful it's only right that you enjoy some of your success for yourself, but my engagement ring was only $600. Some of theirs go into the multi millions. That's excess.

Our ceremony inc. reception will be less than $10000. I haven't priced it all out yet, but that's the cap we're putting on it (including help from parents). That way we might have money for a house and a honeymoon rather than expensive tablecloths that noone will remember.

[Sobek]

lol, just use crappy plastic ones, and paper plates and things of the like, more money left over for aftewards, 10 thou though, holy crap, i'd be reluctant to pay $500 for the entire ordeal.

[Sercee]

I've had some people say that $10000 is a lot of money and others say 'that's it?'.

Until I price it out I won't really know. But that is including our wedding rings and reception and all that so it might be close. Again, we'll see.

[Sobek]

make people bring thier own chairs

[justmeleo]

I think that 10k is a lot too. The only thing that I really want is a nice wedding dress for myself under 1k. Invites can be emailed for all I care. Mom would kill me, but might be worth the laugh. Luckily my relatives live out of town so I seriously doubt many will attempt to make the trip. All part of my strategy for keeping costs down. Love the paper plate idea especially for cake & coffee!

[kittiekat93]

Not that I plan to get married anytime soon, but i think 10k is a pretty good amount. I dont really even want to get married... Its beautiful and all, but I would probably get carried away with the decorations and dresses and stuff, i will probably be a bit more normal then, and I would probably get live flowers instead of withered and dried ones, and i would probably make it look more like a wedding then a funeral. but right now my ideal wedding includes lots of black, red, silver, dried flowers and a full moon. a very goth type wedding. the exact wedding that would kill my overly normal family =D

[Sobek]

sounds like you have issues