Everything Under the Moon

My husband is a psychic vampire to me. He just sucks the life out of me. He's not a bad man, he's not abusive or critical and he doesn't have the intention of doing this to me. His work life is horribly stressful and he works with alot of very bad people (I know, I used to work there too). It is an abusive and negative place. In the meantime when he is around me I feel all the joy and spark sucked out of me. I'm depressed, tired and have alot of physical pain. I'm taking an antidepressant. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to protect myself from his negativity, how to lift my spirits and/or could you send me some healing energy. I feel like I've been sucked dry and have nothing left.

Maybe try to bring more positivity into your home by "beautifying" it. If you live in an apartment you may have a harder time with this, but try buying plants that resonate positive feelings for both you and your husband. Flowers and/or herbs can not only be therapeutic for you to care for, but will take your mind off of the stressful parts of life and his work schedule. If you take up an herb garden you can cleanse those plants and use them in your cooking (see "Kitchen Witch").

If he works in a highly specified field or will have trouble finding a different job, try to dedicate only a short time in the day to talk about work. When it's over don't bring it up again till the next day. Also, spend more time outside. You may wish to research a God or Goddess with earth affiliations and make up a daily or weekly ritual to said God/dess asking them to cleanse you of your stress.

If the anti-depressants you're taking don't seem to help, or you have thoughts of suicide, I would suggest talking to your doctor to try something different until you find the right one. Also, look into your zodiac sign--as a Cancer, I feel a strong affinity to water, so when shit hits the fan I take a long bath or a dip in a local creek to relax. You and your husband may be able to find some solace in your astronomical elements, whatever they may be.

You could also peruse some further education or a new hobby. In my county in New Jersey the vocational high school offers adult night classes so I signed up for an autobody starter class. You wouldn't believe how therapeutic banging on metal, cutting out rust and welding in fresh metal can be! Not to mention the symbolic nature of those actions and what it does to your daytime problems.

Hope this helps.

I will especially look in to Gods and Goddesses and what element my sign in (I'm Taurus). I have alot of plants, but I would like to learn more about Feng Sui too.

Hi doghorse!

Have you tried talking to your husband about this situation? It sounds like you both might need to find alternate ways to decompress. I don't know what the spiritual situation is with your husband so this might sound kind of whacked:

The both of you try to get outdoors shortly after he gets home from work. Just go for a walk together in a park or some place with lots of natural surroundings. Holds hands, or put your arm through his (If he's like most men, this will activate his 'supportive' instincts because you're leaning on his arm for support so he will tend to push his own issues aside for your benefit. Trust me, I'm a guy. LOL.). Feel the sun on your face and the wind. Don't let him get caught up in talking about the daily drama. The both of you just look around and think and talk about how beautiful it is and how very lucky you two are to be there together sharing it. This is a fight you two will have to either win or lose together. IF you two are that important to each other.

There's a story that I like about a dream a guy had. In this dream he and the people he cared most about were all trapped in a deep hole. The guy gave each friend in turn a boost to help them up out of the hole until he was the only one left. Then he realized that he had been so concerned about the others that he'd let himself get trapped in a position where he couldn't get out himself. It was then that one of his friends leaned into the hole and extended a hand to help him up. He found, though, that he no longer had the strength to even lift himself up and said to the friend, "I can't pull myself up!" To which the friend replied, "Then pull me down!"

If necessary, I believe he should leave that work environment. It sounds like it's not only hurting him but destroying what is otherwise a good marriage. I don't think any career is worth that. Better to take a drop in pay if necessary and do without a few luxury items than lose what you've got.

Just saying...

Hope this helped in some small way. Let us know how things go!

One Walker.

If he's open to energy work and the concept of psychic vamprism, you might want to check out Michelle Belanger's book "The Psychic Vampire Codex".

http://sacred-texts.com/goth/vc/index.htm

You could also Google her name or the title and get a feel for what its about. The link is to a full online version of it. Many psychic vampires do not realize what they're doing, the harm it causes to their loved one's or how to stop. If he is one, he has a craving just as real as we do for food. However, that doesn't mean he can't learn to control it by learning energy work and discipline.

Or, if you're using that term simply as a metaphor then follow the other good advice that's been given.

I'm sure he doesn't intend to be a vampire. I took the initiative this weekend and we took the dogs and went camping, even though what I felt I really wanted at the time was to go alone. It turned out to be the best thing. He lightened up. I lightened up. The dogs swam and played which we had a ball watching. We talked alot. He actually listened. I feel more hopeful now. We both love the outdoors and NEED to get out there more often instead of crashing in front of the TV tired and burned out. It was a great weekend and the start of some healing I believe.

Thank you all again.

That's great to hear! I too hope that the trend continues.

One Walker.

Yee ha! That's great!

If he's open to energy work and the concept of psychic vamprism, you might want to check out Michelle Belanger's book "The Psychic Vampire Codex".

http://sacred-texts.com/goth/vc/index.htm

You could also Google her name or the title and get a feel for what its about. The link is to a full online version of it. Many psychic vampires do not realize what they're doing, the harm it causes to their loved one's or how to stop. If he is one, he has a craving just as real as we do for food. However, that doesn't mean he can't learn to control it by learning energy work and discipline.

Or, if you're using that term simply as a metaphor then follow the other good advice that's been given.

Yeah we generally don't realize we're feeding or emitting until someone tells us. Until we learn how to be sensitive to ourselves. As far as psi vamps go. It seems he is real drained by something, and his body is automatically trying to feed to sustain him. Mechanism in the body

As a psychic vampire myself I really don't think your husband is doing this at all deliberately. In fact, he probably isn't a psychic vampire at all.

You said he works for an abusive company, well, he's obviously bringing home a lot of that negative energy with him.
Some people are naturally 'psychic sponges' and others are naturally 'psychic absorbers'. I would say your husband is a sponge and you are an absorber.
He brings the energy home and you absorb it.

First of all you need to sheild yourself from all the negative energy he brings home. Each day before he comes home just put yourself it a reflective bubble or imagine yourself being surrounded by mirrors. If he is open to this idea once a day he should psychically cleanse himself. He should imagine himself under a waterfall and allowing the water to run all over him and take the energy away.
If he isn't open to do this for himself then you can do it for him - maybe when he's asleep.

I'd say you should probably spiritually cleanse your house about once a week because energy people bring in with them can linger in the home too.
Take a lighted candle in to each room at a time and visualise the light of that candle filling the whole room - even under furniture and behind heavy objects and see it burning up all the dark energy it finds.
Do this about once a week ( more if you think it needs it) for the time being and when things settle down about once a month.

I wish you peace.

Thank you again. These are all great suggestions. I do agree that he doesn't intend to drain my energy and in fact consiously does not want to. Him being an absorber makes alot of sense and I think that is a more appropriate word for him than vampire because I think the last thing he'd want to do it hurt me. Great ideas. Thank you all again.

You're Welcome...but not all vampires like or want to hurt people so keep that in mind k? Just defending myself ^-^

Oh I agree. I think for most people they don't intend any hard and alot of the problem I have is not knowing how to shield myself and both my hubby and adult daughter are stressed out and tend to think negatively, but for both of them their outside stressors are very real.

not all vampires like or want to hurt people so keep that in mind k?

I certainly don't want to 'hurt' people when I drain off a little excess energy.
I usually only attach to people who have a lot of psychic energy and probably don't use it anyway.

My grandmother had a lot of psychic energy and didn't use it at all. That energy manifested itself physically, for most of her life she was plagued by various illnesses and I believe those illnesses were a result of her un-used psychic energy turning physical.

So when I meet people with excess psychic energy who don't use it I simply syphon it off and use it myself.
You could say I'm doing them a huge favour.

Hi!
I don't much about psychic vampires but I could related to the concept of a husband who brings home negativity. I've had similar problems with mine!

I gave up trying to get him to be any different and focused on what was within my abilities to do. I worked on the psychic environment in my home.

In addition to all the usual things (candles, incense, energy clearing, shamanic help, reiki...) I started using sound. I started small with singing kid songs with my boys, we also drum and now I've got crystal singing bowls all over the house (where the boys can't reach them!) I use sound every day. I'm feeling better and better. I sort of detached from what my husband was emitting, although I've noticed that he does seem happier these days.

I guess you could say that I 'forgot about him' and focused on raising my own frequency.

hope that helps!
: D
ej