Everything Under the Moon

hi kassandra i want to do a ritual purging myself of past negativity while still honoring that shadow side of myself. i have books filled with poetry i've written years ago and whenever i try to read them it scares me. during that time in my life when i wrote the poems i was filled with anger, shame, self hatred, and suicidal tendencies. i often acted out on these feelings through self harm a technique that served me well at the time because it was the only way i knew how to cope with what i was going through.

unfortunately i continue to be self destructive trying to use past coping skills that are no longer relevant. i was thinking of burning those books of poetry while acknowledging there was a time when those coping strategies served me well but are no longer useful to me. i don't want to deny parts of myself but embrace them transform them moving out of the fear and shadows living with love and staying in the light. almost like a phoenix rising from the ashes being reborn out of the past into the present so i can move forward towards the future. i really appreciate your input ty

One technique that I found useful when dealing with my shadow side was to emotionally and mentally come back to a particular time of the period when I was suffering, and do something that would make the past me feel better. To make an example, when I did shadow work the first image that came to my mind after a long meditation was of a little me crying all alone in her bed, at night, with no one to take care of her. I started crying so much for my suffering that I immediately took my little me in my arms and embraced her. I later wrote on my journal what had happened, and came to the conclusion that there was a time when I was very little when I probably felt alone and abandoned.

By coming back and embracing my past self, I "took the right path," so to say. You may consider revisiting yourself in that period and doing something that would have made your past self feel better, and then journal about it. Don't be scared if it feels too much at the beginning, you may need some time before getting to the root of your pain.

the technique you mentioned sounds so healing , kind, and gentle. i think it's beautiful how you went back and nurtured yourself and is something that strikes a cord with me of when i was young and had similar feelings. ty for sharing your story and opening up so selflessly it helps tremendously to know others have overcome difficulties while still honoring that part of themselves ty

Find out what it wants...

My whole youth was filled with clinical depression and suicidal ideation. I found the goddess to be a great help to release past pains, but if you can afford it and are brave enough counseling or support groups help. I personally burned all my past poetry and gave away a lot of my gothic jewelry/music/clothes. Also sunshine, balanced diet, and exercise although it sound corny really does help with emotional pains.
It's been 20 yrs since high school , yeh Iam old, and I still get depressed when I think back on all the BS I had to go through.
Obsidian and apache tears help with sorrow and grief. Don't use them for to long as they cause fear or anxiety with over use. Good luck with your journey.

it's funny you mentioned obsidian i have a taurus (my zodiac) obsidian worry stone i purchased months ago. i think i'll keep it handy during my more troublesome days. i also go to emdr therapy to reprocess memories helping to acknowledge them and leave them in the past. perhaps their is no one answer maybe different pieces of myself need different types of healing. that's why i'm so drawn to this site so many people have such valuable input like i can use something from everyone. ty for sharing how you care for yourself that it is possible to come out the other side stronger then when i began

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I love the title you gave your post, "Honoring the Shadow Side." I like how you didn't word it as dealing with or tolerating the shadow side, but honoring it. That's hard to do. For many people it's difficult even admitting they have a shadow side. And exploring it can be painful, disappointing, shocking, a number of things. It's good to work with some kind of counselor whenever doing this kind of inner work, or at least working with someone you can confide in and trust with your personal matters.

Regarding your poetry, my vote is to keep it, even if you put it in a box and give it to someone close to you for safekeeping, just to physically distance yourself from it for a while. I'm loathe to think of someone discarding their most heartfelt poetry. Such things seem so precious to me. I still have one poem I wrote during high school at (what felt then like) my lowest point. I could not dream of throwing away that flimsy, tattered and yellowed piece of typing paper (eventually, I had to put it in a sheet protector) that traveled so many miles with me, both physically and emotionally.

I think it's important to embrace my shadow side as part of me at all times, good and bad, so I like saving things like that, and looking back on my journey from time to time. But, you have to do what feels best for you, and discarding old things seems to have worked well for Isis3Anubis in the past, so the same may likewise work for you. By the way, I like Isis3Anubis's pointing out that crystals used in certain ways, such as how she described, would eventually have served their purpose, and as one's energy changes, so would our need for them change. I have experienced this, as well.

Also, Isis3Anubis's experience of addressing and comforting one's wounded inner child is a powerful therapy. There are guided meditations of that which you could find online (I had a link to one, but don't remember it now; they're not hard to find, though). Another technique is to write that side of yourself a letter. This can be difficult at times, and you may need more than one session of writing to complete it. You could take that one step further and write a letter to yourself from that side of yourself.

Amazing what comes out. These letter-writing techniques are also helpful in "communicating" with people in our lives with whom we may be estranged for whatever reason (example, a difficult parent, an ex, someone passed to spirit, or anyone with whom we've had a hurtful relationship). You write them the letters and never give them to them (unless you want to), and the self-expression alone is cathartic, healing and enlightening.

Really glad to hear the EMDR therapy worked well for you. I've known about it, but I've never read about anyone here actually to have undergone it, and with successful results, so the feedback is insightful.



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Try meditating in total darkness

meditation seems to be a frequent suggestion regarding this post i think i have an idea of how to include the suggestion that resonate with me. starting with mediation first to guide me through the healing process of nurturing my inner child/past self by writing them a letter of apology and forgiveness and finally purge myself of past techniques that were once vital for my survival but are no longer useful by burning the books of poetry and written letters in the fire as a way of letting go releasing the ashes and be born anew. re leaving myself of past burdens that have weighed me down following me into the present. ty to everyone who shared their story and all your helpful heartfelt suggestions

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Here's an informative post Xiao made about working with both the negative and positive aspects of the shadows in our personalities. http://everythingunderthemoon.net/forum ... 26966.html

{EDIT, putting this alternative link here until we see if the glitch can be fixed}

viewtopic.php?f=16&t=26966

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