Everything Under the Moon

From far away the bell has rung
The last of my life has just begun
The time has come to make my choice
I answer but cannot find my voice
How can one reject love or peace
Or who can put my mind at ease
There is neither compromise nor gray
One or the other and it is my say
The one who makes the ocean tremble
Or one who makes it calm and reassemble
Either way I stand to lose
Because love and peace will never fuse
I want to be steady but wish to run
The last of my life has just begun


For all the people who know poetry, I do not. I doubt this is in correct form, I don't even know if there is such a thing as correct form. These are my thoughts, thats about all I know..tell me what you think. Keep in mind this is one of the few poems I have ever wrote.

It sounds very optimistic, like you're ready to face the next step in your path.

I don't think there is such thing as 'correct' poetry either, just individual styles, btw.

there are certain poetic forms that follow certain rules. such as sonnets, limericks and those sort.
limericks are pretty cool and by far my favourite style of poetry i write them sometimes.

but most people(like you, judging from the above) write in free-verse which basically is written how ever the hell you choose to write it.

Your poem's great. Like music, poetry can be structured. In formal poetry, the lines of a poem can have a specific rhythm and meter. This would dictate that certain lines have a set number of repetitions of a given rhythmic pattern.

A well known example is the line form called iambic-pentameter. Iambic-pentameter basically means that each line contains five repetitions of a rhythmic pattern called an iamb. An iamb consists of two syllables, the first being unstressed and the second being stressed. An example of an iamb is the word 'about'. People say: a-BOUT, not A-bout (the emphasis is on the 'BOUT').

When writing a line in iambic-pentameter, you would choose your words so that the emphasis of the syllables roughly/mostly matched the pattern of five iambs:

beneath the world a growling monster waits.
|
| spoken as
V
be-neath the-world a-grow ling-mon ster-waits.

An iamb is just one type of rhythmical unit, you don't have to know all their names and you can mix, match and make them up. Basically, you work with different patterns of syllable emphasis. Also, if most of the natural emphasis of the syllables in the words you choose matches a recognizable or repeated pattern, the occasional word which doesn't fit may be naturally read with the wrong emphasis. This can cause some dissonance and accentuate that word.

Generally, most poetic forms will cycle the rhythm and meter of each line (or every line will have the exact same metric form).

Following a structured form gives your poem a special power, much like the power of structured music. Once you get going on something, the form you choose (or create) can help drive the creative process. Another thing to keep in mind is that 'rhythm' can also be free-form. That is, you can still think about rhythm without intending to follow a cyclic rhythmical pattern. It's really up to your personal sense of flow and style.

As Sobek said, there are even stricter forms of poetry which impose other guidelines such as rhyming. You might find these enjoyable as well.

I agree with Sercee in that I don't think there's a such thing as 'correct' form. I think if you try to write something using rules and theory, you'll fail. Whether your motivation is passion, angst, humor, boredom or trickery, creative expression comes from the spirit and from your own personal experience.

I do think that looking over different poetic forms and learning something about techniques like rhyme, rhythm, harmony, dissonance and alliteration can certainly help broaden your horizons.

Like many people, you already have a good sense of composition.

I liked your poem. It seems to echo a common theme which I've seen in other poems on this forum: being torn by choices which must be made. To choose one, one must seemingly set the other aside. There's also this sense of destiny. You say "From far away the bell has rung" in your first line, this seems to say to me that some external force calls into you the knowledge that you must lead a life, and face, probably more than one dilemma. There's a sense of unfairness as you hint at the fact that some choices have no good outcome. Well, it probably all meant something different to you, but that's my take

Thanks for sharing,

T. Guy.

Thanks for the input everyone!

ThatGuy-You really got the jist of the poem, that is almost exactly what I was thinking about when I wrote it. I actually sat down and wanted to write a poem but didn't know what to write about, then I just started writing and it just came to me, probably because that is the dilema I am facing right now in my life. I think I will try writing in different kinds of forms, make things more interesting and more challenging. Thanks for what you said..I was nervous for what people may say, I think it was a good nervous though.

Sobek- I looked up some examples of limericks, they are quite cool. I will try to write in some sort of form next time, I don't know if it will be limerick, but some kind of form. Like I said, I don't write much poetry so it may be awhile, but this one felt good to get it off my chest, so I may write more often.

Secree-haha it was actually the opposite of what you thought it was!
Its so cool though how poetry can mean different things to different people. If you don't mind me asking, have you just overcome an obstacle and are ready to face the next step in your life? I know that when I listen to a song or read a poem I make a connection to what is going on in my life at the time. So if I listen to a song when I am sad, it is a sad song or has something to do with my situation, but when I listen to that same song when I am happy, I still see it having something to do with my situation and it becomes a happy song.

I'm definately like that, Kate. I reinterpret things constantly based on what I'm experiencing. But that's how people grow I think, is by seeing everything in a different perspective. Obviously, your poem meant something completely different to me than anyone else, but that meaning made such perfect sense to me that I really am surprised at how 'off' I was. But that happens all the time, especially with works where the author is dead so all you can do is speculate

Thank you for the poem, though.

"I was nervous for what people may say, I think it was a good nervous though. "

fair enough, but you have to remember your not writing your poetry scambling for the approval of others(atleast i hope not anyway).

as far as the forms go i find limerick to be the easiest to write in, but thats my personal preference. you may have difficulty with them but find something else more to your liking.

Sobek- No I am not trying to get approval..haha this is just the first time I have ever put any of my work out there for the public to see. Whatever feels right is what form I will write in

Secree-Oh yeah thats how I am too..I love seeing how other people interpreted the poem though..all the better!