Pagan- neopagan?

[Sastual Auxels]

I've been pagan for about a year or maybe 2? anyway, I have been trying to keep a stronghold on being as close to the ancient beliefs as possible but it's hard when all pagan books were burnt by the christians and that oldest spells being only christian ones.
I want to know what YOUR definition and example of what a true pagan would believe and the pantheon?

Also I want to be powerful, I have the energy, there is something about me I have felt it since I was only 4-5yrs old and always known it, I just can't put my finger on it, I have no special gifts (I trained myself to telepath, getting really good now haha) I know there is something deep inside me, something huge, like a stockpile of energy or something (it seems stupid because I can't explain myself at all but what I mean is, there is something to do with my spirit or soul or something deep down that has great power idk) example, when I was young and forced into Christian beliefs I always used to think I was like the new jesus or something great because I had something about me, something inside me. I may not make sense but I've always felt this energy deep inside me and its huge.
I guess what I'm asking in relation to this is what do you think it is/ how to access it or do you think I'm just nuts? lol
Please comment even slander or criticism is accepted.

[)O( Krystal Raven )O(]

I've been pagan for about a year or maybe 2? anyway, I have been trying to keep a stronghold on being as close to the ancient beliefs as possible but it's hard when all pagan books were burnt by the christians and that oldest spells being only christian ones.
I want to know what YOUR definition and example of what a true pagan would believe and the pantheon?

***This is an intelligent question! There is only one way to be a "true pagan" in my belief system, and that is to contact the Divine for yourself. This also insures your source of information is as ancient as possible, since you're speaking with the Being that started it all..... My pantheon is mostly Egyptian and Hindu, but since I was born of many races, it is common for me to resonate with and connect to many, many ancient pantheons. Isis, the Divine and Primordial Mother of All, once had countless libraries and temples filled with amazing literature and works of sublime art. Now, most of Her temples are either in ruins, buried, lost, or converted into churches. As recently as 40 years ago on official record, Catholic Clergy has burnt and destroyed sacred works devoted to Her. ::darkmood::

Also I want to be powerful, I have the energy, there is something about me I have felt it since I was only 4-5yrs old and always known it, I just can't put my finger on it, I have no special gifts (I trained myself to telepath, getting really good now haha) I know there is something deep inside me, something huge, like a stockpile of energy or something (it seems stupid because I can't explain myself at all but what I mean is, there is something to do with my spirit or soul or something deep down that has great power idk) example, when I was young and forced into Christian beliefs I always used to think I was like the new jesus or something great because I had something about me, something inside me. I may not make sense but I've always felt this energy deep inside me and its huge.
I guess what I'm asking in relation to this is what do you think it is/ how to access it or do you think I'm just nuts? lol
Please comment even slander or criticism is accepted.

***This feeling is actually very common in people of this era. We are the ones who will be watching some of the most incredible cosmic events of our planet's history, in the flesh. This endless potential is actually your spirit itself!!!!!! Connect with your Higher Consciousness, and You will continue to empower your wordly existence and develop spiritual abilities!!

[Sastual Auxels]

How do I connect with my gods? I have had many dreams where I walk through some portal to find Danu or some other goddess/mother standing before me, how can I just simply talk, I would give anything for a divine mother to nurture me and give me sight into what I cannot see, to help me through the next part of light and tell me where to step!

[AutumnMaidens]

There are certain types of rituals that work well for connecting with the gods, if you have a certain god(dess) you would like to connect with it usually helps to find their element first. Danu as the celtic mother goddess has an affinity with rivers and wells so contacting her through water is an option or the more dianic aproach would be to contact her through your own womanhood by meditating on your 2nd chakra (womb) and third eye where you can call to her as the mother.

My other advice would be to communicate with them when you meet them in dreams but also when you're just walking or sitting somewhere and you happen to think of them, call to them in ritual and make communication a normal thing, even if in most cases you wont get a reply, she will still be listening.

Hope this helped and if I think of any more I'll be sure to comment.
Bless

[Sastual Auxels]

Yeah well I always live near water, I used to call to her and give her thanks while under a full moon in the river near my house, now I live on the side of the ocean and go down on a full moon and drink, she's never contacted me or anything so I've given up giving her any thanks, I haven't really got anything to thank her for.
I'm sure contact through womanhood would be good except I'm a guy haha, kinda makes womanhood hard?
If you have any rituals I could use? I mean if you search the internet your going to find something that is full of doo doo and wont work, I'm after old rituals, I want rituals over 400yrs old, I have a celtic wound healing spell that is over 800yrs old but that is it, nothing else is anything like it.

[AutumnMaidens]

Self written rituals work better than anything else really, the only thing that makes old rituals work is the fact that the intent of the person writing it was clear and that as a pagan we believe in the old paths. I would always suggest writing your own because you know what you need and what you want, intent being the key factor.

Gods and/or Goddesses are not prone to random contact. Searching for them and concidering them in everyday life will bring you closer to them.
I once did a ritual where I called on the god and goddess to bring me a vision and I meditated on their being and had two visions, I don't think if I had not put the effort in to search for them that they would have appeared.
Really anchient practices when dealing with gods would be the roman/greek house alter where they would sacrifice wine and bread with each meal and thank the gods for whatever blessings they recieved. Throwing a piece of bread in the fireplace to honour the household gods for the bounty that they bring.
What I always do when I move and I have been taught to have been a celtic practice, was to choose my connection tree. One tree that I will talk to, take care of and bring offerings to, I will charge it under the full moon and it will charge me back. In celtic tradition almost each god/dess has their own tree so choosing your tree and later seeing which god/dess fits that tree could maybe show you which one would fit you.

I also believe we need different god/desses in different parts of our life. The maiden mother and crone call upon different aspects of our lives so if a certain god/dess falls in the background it may just mean this one is not needed in your spiritual growth at this point in time.

Hope this helped
Bless

[Sastual Auxels]

I am against writing my own, there is no way I would be as gifted as the ancients, they were directly connected to the gods... in this world we have forgotten and mistreated our gods, in that respect I don't see why they would answer anything we create ourselves, calling on the energies of our ancients is more meaningful and full of energy for they are from a better time, reciting the words long written would definitely bring action, simply saying something I write will do nothing because I write it and its from a time where we have forgotten the gods, they deserve our respect but we as a race forgot them and burnt books on their teachings and waged war not only on ourselves but on the earth, like Danu or any other god would answer to someone or anyone who creates something after so much destruction we have caused her?

No wonder she hasn't answered my prayers and thanks, what god would answer any of us? We pretty much turned our backs on them after all they done. No wonder everything that has happened this year has happened, tsunami and earthquakes and cyclones...

thats off topic but I'm right, the gods are angry and they should be we pretty much spat in their face and allowed Christianity to turn the world into what it is today.

So I don't see how writing my own ritual would work, I haven't the knowledge the ancients did.

[JBRaven]

I think you give the "ancients" too much. They were people just like us. Why would the Gods be angry? If they are divine they understand the cycle, belief-unbelief, connect and disconnect. The witch/pagan are not a mythical creature that had a mainline to the Gods, they just were more open. I write my own rituals and save a few that were really dumb, they have yet to fail me.

There is one law in my faith and it is : KNOW THYSELF.

Knowing yourself in all aspects and acceptance of who you are. Have strength in your own thoughts.

[AutumnMaidens]

I for one don't think our gods are as unforgiving as the christians represent their god, I would like to believe the goddess would simple smile and shake her head as the christians now get angry at the mere mention of a goddess yet hold pillars for Mary the mother of god, she is and always will be our mother and as every mother is ever forgiving and loving. That doesn't mean she cant get angry but the moment you open your heart to her she will as well.

But it is your opinion and no doubt grounded in what for you would seem like enough experience to have that judgement. Just remember that words spoken from the heart can be more meaningful than whatever you recite. Someone could recite shakespeare to say they love you and sound lovely but someone who honestly says "I love you" can bring a cold heart to melt.

Bless

[Sastual Auxels]

I'm not saying any of our god/esses are anything like that thing Christian's turn to but I also wouldn't expect them to sit back and take crap for thousands of years. I mean in the book of invasions, the Tuatha freed humans from enslavement and horrible things brought to us by the Fir Bolg and later on we tell them we don't need them and end up converting to Christianity? How disrespectful is that?
I don't believe the ancients as some mythical race etc, but they did have direct contact with the Gods and had a better ethic/ idea of life/ respect for the gods.
I'll try writing my own ritual but I doubt it will do as I acquire it to, I don't have my self belief or believe in myself.

[AutumnMaidens]

Actually, if you look at Great Britian for instance, most kingdoms who converted to christianity did not force their people to convert but to attend church. I think that people might have gone because their king so wished but that they still worshipped their respective gods in private thats why so many pagan beliefs were adopted by the christian invasion, because there would otherwise be no way for them to convert the amount of people that they did.
Some viking groups had a temple of Odin and a temple of Christ side by side because they didn't see the christ faith to be a threat.

So it wasn't like they all just suddenly threw up their hands and denounced their gods, it started with their king forcing it upon them which would have been al right since they could still worship in private, but when the christian leaders found this out they simple decided to iradicate it or force feed it to people.
At least that's what I remember from my history lessons

But I think that it's rare enough if you find really ancient rituals and/or spells that you would hardly ever be able to do a ritual right?

[Sastual Auxels]

Exactly, I hardly ever do rituals which is bad but I always give thanks to the gods.

I always thought it was different, I thought that as soon as Constantine legalized christianity they burnt the books and killed the pagans, I think most wouldnt have practiced their faith out of sheer fear. I still have to do more research on what exactly happened and I have many dates that are influencial but I'm sure it was something like that.

So yeah my ritual use is minimal, due to not having "worthy" rituals and also the fact half my family have shunned me and dont talk to me due to my being pagan so expressing my faith is a lil hard

[AutumnMaidens]

Well there are a few documentaries out there that state otherwise and I would like to believe that it took a while for christianity to grow to the size that it did. I remember from Raymond Buckland his book that the only reason Christianity was able to intigrate in the beginning was that it made things easier for a lot of people (only one god and one set of rules to remember) and that they included a lot of pagan symbols that made it seem so close to what the people were already believing that the building they prayed in and the symbol they wore and the names were the few things that changed. Then with a steady following they found strength in numbers and started a negative publicity stunt againt anything pagan.

But I believe that much with the jewish oppression of the second world war they still continued their worship in secret and passed down the mysteries by word of mouth.
Not that there were a lot of books in those days any way since the written word was kept mostly for royalty and druids who used ruins and the anglo-saxon alphabet if I'm not mistaking.
And I don't think it's bad that you hardly do rituals, there are plenty of pagans who never do rituals and simple encumber their religion in everyday life through prayer and alter worship etc. To them ritual is associated soley with magick.

*looks back at text* Damn, if I'm starting to bore you please tell me. ^^; Guess I just love discussing history

[Sastual Auxels]

Yeah I guess your right,
But there were many books at that time, I read $10000 worth of books were burnt when the Apostle Paul went to Ephesus which was a few years before Christianity was banned, I don't think it took too long though Constantine had a lot of power and created Catholicism as a half way point for pagans to go to but I dnt know, maybe I'm mistaken and Constantine didn't order the killing of pagans, in which case it would have probably taken some time, don't know why I always thought Constantine slaughtered pagans? Come to think of it he didn't actually convert until shortly before his death. Which Emperor commissioned the slaughter of pagans? There had to be a leader who said join or die?

[AutumnMaidens]

I've read a lot about Paul as well, wasn't he the one who cut down the Druid oak and decided the evergreen was the tree of christ?
I don't doubt a lot of books were burned because that's what the christians were known for, I don't know a lot about Constantine but no doubt there were leaders who forced it, especially during the crusades when Christianity was handed to people on a sharpened blade. Ugh...
But I have heard that the romans when they were still bigger than the christians that they tried to use the bible to force their laws unto people, so really the bible is a collection of old roman laws, which makes sense in a lot of ways (hint leviticus, deutoronomy etc)