Fist, I hope is the right place to post this here, but I didn't know where else to post it since has to do with the Goddess I worship.
I worship Selene, The Goddess of the Moon. I felt an attraction for Moon since I was very little and I always knew that if I'll have to choose a Goddess, she will be the one. The thing is that there are some strange things about it and it's happening like this since I can remember and I still can't find an explanation for it, even if I searched in many books. I don't have too many people I can ask about such thing and the ones I know don't have an answer.
The thing is that every time is Full Moon I behave very strange. I act differently and it depends on the month. One month I can be like a five year old child and the next month I can be... Well, just lets say the opposite, but this happens only when I look at the moon and when I look at her, she drags me into a trance and after I feel she is letting me go, I start acting strange and I do things... That normally I wouldn't (once I went outside and started to dance in my pajamas ). Sometimes I remember about my behavior and sometimes not and the next day my boyfriend tells me what I did and I am like: No way!... Sometimes my boyfriend, if he is next to me, he brakes the connection that is made between me and the moon, but I still feel after that a big amount of energy that makes me want to look more at the moon and act strange, but I can control myself if he does that and if he doesn't... I am controlled by the energy moon is sending me.
For a time now, I am avoiding to look at the Full Moon, even if I hear a woman's voice calling for me every time, but inside of me I still know that I am me, but with a different behavior.
I can't explain this and I didn't find a reason. I never did something to upset the Goddess and I take care of everything how I am supposed to take, in my way, but this thing is a part of almost my entire life and I don't know why is happening. I love full moon (is my favourite part of the month)and I had times when I was still normal, but what is happening it scares me a little. Is it normal?
One more thing... My relationship with the Goddess is good. I never had problems and she helps me every time I need her help and I thank her for it, but this thing is driving me crazy. The thing is even if I worship her, I believe in other Gods and Goddesses, too. Is this a possibility to make her upset? ( But I don't think this would be a problem, right?)
Thank you in advance if you answer me.
Take care!
